last time i posted...

i realized was pretty early in 2010. and the post was rather dark.
i wrote about having been mugged, and the fear that haunted me.
it's amazing how distant that feels now. it feels like it was ages ago, and it almost feels like it happened to another person, not me.
of course it happened to me. and i've been apprehensive ever since.
but i don't feel so afraid anymore. i've acquired a new appreciation of things. and i can look back and realize it wasn't such a big deal after all. and i even feel a bit silly for having felt that way. true, it was justified, but maybe i learned something about myself, and how i can overcome certain things.
i just wish that, almost a year later, people would stop asking me about it.
they actually do. not like they really care, somehow it seems like they actually think it's an interesting topic of conversation. and i don't know how to let them know i really don't want to talk about it without gettting rude. it's just, i really don't feel like talking about it anymore. it's not all that hurtful anymore, it's just annoying. it's in the past, why would i want to bring it up frequently? "so, did they ever find your car?" "i don't really care." and then they think i'm rude. but i honestly don't know and i certainly don't care. how can i put it in those simple words without sounding rude? i can't. i can't be bothered.
someday they will all forget about it. like i did.
like the lyrics from my favorite song that i might get tattooed somewhere on my body someday: let it go, this too shall pass.

if at first you don't succeed...

last year was a failed attempt at keeping an online journal by posting musings and retellings of my woeful days of unexcitement.
this year, i'll give it another try. but between tumblr and this, lamentably tumblr takes up a lot of my time with stimulating randomness. but this, i feel, can be a lot more focused. so i will try, i really will.
especially since one of my friends just started her own blog, in which she will be documenting her progress as she trains for running her first marathon. and i decided to go along with her.
(mind you, i don't really plan to run any marathons, but i felt like training as if i will. maybe eventually i will muster up the courage to do it, but for now, i just want to get healthier).